I'm Tired

I'm tired. I took off work today because I'm tired... Tired of spending the better part of my time hating the job that I do so that I can live in a remote area that I love. I am hardly ever there.

I'm tired of having to make money to support a government so that I can keep my land and the house they told me I could build.

I have worked for 40 years. Somehow during that time I envisioned how I wanted to live and managed to attain that dream in the past couple of years. Now my dream is being over shadowed by the need to make money to sustain a very small portion of how I would like to live.

I'm tired of going to work with a knot in the pit of my stomach hoping that the day was already over. I don't know how many more days I have to regret. I'm tired of listening to grouchy people who feel they have the right to make me miserable as a means to make themselves feel better. I used to be one of those people...angry, frustrated, unhappy about my life and myself. I made everyone around me hurt. What did I gain from this? Tired and worn down. I am forgetting to watch the sunrise and set.

I have a website in hopes of making enough money so that I don't have to have outside income. I am finding that I like telling stories. That I am not a salesperson. Once it was time to monetize my site, I lost all focus and interest. One person told me that my website reads like a blog. They were right. So here I am on my blog.

I know this is not the norm for offgrid living but I think it comes with the territory. How do you make a living while living off grid? How do you live once you find out how you want to live?